When I reach the state of not being able to respond and eat on my own for one week, I want to pull the plug. That is not living but only existing. I see it all around. Don’t allow that to happen to me. I’m 86 years old and have had a good life and lovely family. Let me go.

DEAR READER:
You present a very compelling argument. I personally agree that quality of life is much more important than quantity of life.

With that in mind, I hope you have shared your feelings with your family or the appropriate individuals in charge. A simple Health Care Proxy, Living Will or other document recognized by your state should be in place to protect you and honor your wishes. If you haven’t taken this step, I suggest you do so at once. If you are in a nursing home, you probably already have everything in order.

At 86 you appear to be of sound mind and able to express your true feelings. I hope that means you continue to read, watch the news on television, participate in social events to the best of your ability, and gain pleasure from family and friends. We all must make concessions as we age, myself included. Somehow, while difficult to recognize initially, the changes allow us to look at life through a different perspective and that‘s not all bad. In fact, it’s called maturity.

Fluff up that pillow behind your head, put a smile on your face, and keep the letters coming my way. I like your spunk and straightforward approach.

DEAR READER: Most attorneys have the necessary forms on file for people who need them. I suggest that you work with your lawyer who can also advise you about filling them out correctly. If you do not wish to do this, I recommend you check with your local hospital. These facilities often have the necessary forms and may offer assistance with filling them out.

Because each state has different laws, I don’t believe there is one form that will work in all states. However, there is a website (www.ehow.com) that offers tips to those individuals who wish to go through the effort of writing their own. (The website offers tips on many different topics.) I don’t recommend this option however, because it may require extensive research and the advice of an attorney.

Living wills and health care proxies are important documents that tell your physician and hospital how to handle your care should you become incapacitated or terminally ill. These forms can also assign a power of attorney or health care agent who can make decisions for you should you not be able to make them yourself. I suggest all adults have one to help protect themselves and their families from unwanted or unnecessary medical attention.